Category: anxiety

Debunking 3 Common Myths about Sensitive Women and Public Speaking

Does public speaking freak you out?

For many sensitive women, just the idea of being on the spot, forced to think while feeling, while being observed, creates sweaty palms!

I know it used to for me, before I learned how switch from freeze to flow! And, now, I love it!

And, in order to enjoy it, it’s important to be clear on what works.

What I’m going to share with you today are 3 common myths of public speaking, specific to being a sensitive person.

The last one is my personal favorite because it highlights what we sensitive women bring to the table and to the world, which everyone is interested in! I’ll give you a hint: our feelings! Feelings are great motivators; they call us to listen, to be aware, and to connect meaningfully with others. When in balance with ourselves, sensitive women have so much to offer the world!

Here are the myths. And, if it moves you, share this article, sign up for my free newsletter (you get my complimentary 5 Gifts of Sensitivity article, too!), and/or share your thoughts. I’d love to hear them!

Myth: Just focus on what you’re saying, and you’ll be fine.

Truth: Focusing only on what you’re saying, when you’re a feeling-oriented person creates more anxiety because of all the energy you’re spending on blocking your feelings and demanding that you be in control. It also creates really dry, boring talks! Emotion gives speech life!

2. Myth: Just focus on a friendly face in the room. Maybe someone you know.

Truth: Sensitive people can get all hung up on facial expressions and what they mean. If you’re looking to the audience to support you, you might get focused there, rather than on your talk. If you’re dependent on someone smiling, it puts all the control outside of yourself! And, if you know the person, you might feel more anxious!

Instead, I teach a method to help people find their center, feel their vitality, and speak with passion and power! You can find out more here!

You can also sign up for my newsletter with uplifting and powerful tips to access the best parts of being sensitive, as well as upcoming events. You’ll receive my complimentary article, “5 Ways to Access the Gifts of Your Sensitivity,” when you do!

3. Myth: If you just relax and stop being so anxious, you’ll give a great talk!

Truth: Trying to stop who you are and how you’re feeling creates more of what you don’t want.

Anxiety gives us energy, interest, and enthusiasm!

It is our life force energy and, when we let it flow, powerful, exciting things happen! Blocking it creates rifts within us and distracts us. But, when we welcome it, a clearing happens!

We find our ground and center within the heightened energy, like the center within a storm, and everything slows down.

Did you know? Anxiety is registered in our bodies the same way as excitement. Our bodies can’t tell the difference! It’s our minds that tell us what we should believe about our experiences of short breath, high energy, excitement, and fast thoughts!

So, part of success in giving a talk is not fighting what you’re feeling, but, allowing your natural life force energy to flow!

See anxiety as a welcome addition of passion about your great talk, and watch it diminish and leave the best parts: the energy!

For more exciting suggestions on anxiety and presentations, stay tuned! I’ll be sharing more tips in the coming months! ~ Heather

Overthinking? Change Your Mood in 5 Easy Steps
How to Interrupt Overthinking & Start Feeling Calm Again

confident woman

Overthinking is a very common experience for Highly Sensitive people and Empaths who are prone to having high standards, caring a lot, feeling a lot, and noticing all the details and depth of interactions.

Sound like you?

Excessive planning, thinking, rehearsing or replaying conversations often comes from a wish to do things well, to be understood, (or to understand something), and a feeling that life happens too quickly.

But getting stuck in your head can leave you feeling down, unproductive, anxious, empty and upset, without any resolution!

Here are 5 ways to move beyond the cycle and back into life!

1. Experience the difference.

Acknowledge that you’d like to have a different experience than what you’re feeling right now.

  • Go for different as opposed to good.
  • When you’re down or upset, it can be too big a stretch to try to feel good or happy or even calm.
  • Ask yourself to be open to having a different experience. Who knows what it will be yet? 😉

2. Try 3 rounds of Loving Kindness Meditation (& expect nothing).

May I be safe. (take a breath)

May I be peaceful. (take a breath)

May I be at ease. (take a breath)

May I be happy. (take a breath)

  • Do 3 rounds.
  • Expect nothing, just let yourself feel.
  • Give yourself full permission to be where you’re at.
  • Notice what comes.
  • See how you breathe, and what feelings emerge.
  • Expect nothing. When you’re a perfectionist, you already have HUGE demands of yourself. This exercise sets you free to just be you.
  • Give yourself FULL permission just to BE. 🙂

3. Do something physically active that brings you comfort.

Move to change your feelings.

 

4. Notice what you do like in your environment.

  • When you’re feeling upset, it’s easy to focus intently on what’s wrong within or around you. Let’s shift that!
  • Don’t push; just allow.
  • Be curious and open — this shifts your feelings.

5. Choose 1 list of 5 Things:

  • Name 5 things to be grateful for (and really feel them!) OR
  • Compliment 5 people OR
  • Choose uplifting words for the first 5 letters of the alphabet (e.g. Altruism, beautiful, creativity, delight!, everlasting). Feel those words!

Now, assess and return to #1, is something different?  How are you feeling?

In Summary

For most Highly Sensitive people, a balance between thinking, feeling, and action is at the heart of well-being.

Girl jumping

If you’d like personalized help with being more present and moving beyond overthinking, feel free to contact me for a session, and if you appreciated this article, please share it with friends!

#mindfulness #overthinking #worry #HSP #Empath #presence #lovingkindness #acceptance #love #empowerment

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Dr. Heather Schwartz is a coach and guide with a 20-year background in mindfulness and psychology, and who works with  Highly Sensitive women & Empaths on their energy so they can trust themselves and share their gifts with the world!